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Divorce

When God planned our world, He meant for families to stay together and never live apart. Unfortunately, Satan spoiled the perfect world that God planned. Now divorce happens to one out of every two families. Moms and Dads split up and children deal with living apart from one or both parents. Maybe you are going through this or know someone who is. Let’s go to the Bible and see what God says about divorce.

What was God’s original plan for families?
  God's plan for marriage was from the very beginning.  "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24, NKVJ).  

Didn’t God change His plan after sin began? It was God's plan, even after sin, that marriages would last until death.  Look at Romans 7:2, NIV. "By law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage." That tells us that marriage in God's eyes is for keeps until one of the partners die. The Bible even tells us in Malachi 2:16, "I hate divorce."

I hate divorce too, but is there any promise that God will bring my parents back together again?  God will not force anyone and there is no magic formula that will cause your parents to come back together again.  But God promised that He will hear you when you pray.  It's found in Jeremiah 29:12, RSV, "Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you."  That doesn't mean that your parents will automatically change their minds, but you will give God, through your prayers, an opportunity to speak to their minds. Your prayers matter!  Keep praying!

I love both of my parents, and I don't want to be without either of them.  What do I do?  God understands the hurt you are going through. It’s in the Bible, "In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths" (Proverbs 3:6, NKJV).  He will help you know what to do; just keep depending on Him.  He also comforts us when we are sad, lonely, or afraid of the future.  He is the "God of all comfort."  2 Corinthians 1:3.

What do I do if I'm feeling angry with the parent that left?  God's Word doesn't give us an excuse not to honor our parents.  He tells us in the fifth commandment found in Exodus 20:12, NKJV, "Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the LORD your God is giving you."  There's even a promise in that commandment for you!  Can you spot it?  God has also told us that we are to "love one another as I have loved you" (John 15:12, NKJV).  He will put that love back in your heart if you ask Him. Remember love is a gift from God in the first place! "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God" (1 John 4:7, NIV).

Can God forgive my parents if they have gotten a divorce?  Yes. "But if we confess our sins to him, he can be depended on to forgive us and to cleanse us from every wrong” (1 John 1:9, TLB). This doesn't say God will forgive only some sins, but any sin that we confess.   

Remember, it's not your fault that your parents are divorced.  What can you do about it?  You can continue to be the best child you can be by asking God to make you obedient, loving, forgiving, especially to the parent you feel anger towards.  The best thing you can do is to continue praying for your parents that God will help you to love them both.

Click here to see our Troubleshooters issue on Family.